Going in

I knew

it was


yet I hope(d) and my heart

went in recklessly —

a kamikaze jackass,

a hero of unrequited

love hell-

bent on

on breaking itself

time after time

and time aqain.


I knew that we

(there is no we except

in my imagination)

would never be us —

that the bluest eyes


would never look at me

(only through, around, over and past)

and see me 

the me I wanted them to see;

no way

would I ever be anything but

a muted commercial during

the pee-break of

your Hallmark Channel movie; that

the love song on

the tip of your tongue


forming on your lips

would never be


that the one

and only on your


in your heartbeat

is another pair of blue eyes,

that I

am the occasional

afterthought, usually

the un-thought.


After years of hanging

on to nothing,


the story of my life

begins and ends


the bluest eyes






3 thoughts

  1. Susan I love the thoughtbytes that go through a person’s mind if they are thinking about an object (subject) of affection. How many times do we sell ourselves short when we do it? Good poem.

    Liked by 1 person

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