Darlene’s Dilemma

Today’s writing prompt at Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie is the photo below by Julien Tabet.

Her real name was Darlene, but the entire herd — including the brain-damaged shepherd — called her Baldie.

Sheep could be so very cruel, she thought, as she stood munching alone in the far corner of the meadow. Most people think sheep are timid,  fearful, and well, sheepish. Hah! Not this bunch of barbaric Bovidae.

Can I help it I inherited my parent’s crappy hair genes? Darlene lamented. Life is so unfair!

One evening she stayed up late to watch the remake of “The Shushing of the Sheep” on FarmFlix, and during the commercial break she found the answer to her dilemma: Spanish Sur-Gro!

If this stuff worked on people, it would probably work on sheep too, she concluded. Same thing only different…


SusanWritesPrecise/ Susan Marie Shuman


So, Darlene ordered a case of the stuff. When the box finally arrived, she gnawed it open and set about eradicating her baldness. All the while anticipating how hot she would look with long, flowing, wooly tresses … the guys would find her absolutely irresistible!

And that is exactly the way it panned out. The ewes were extremely envious of Darlene and her new ‘do, as the rams stood slobbering and rhapsodizing over her beauty.

From then on, Darlene was known as the “Lady Godiva of Sheepdom.”

When shearing time rolled around, sure enough, Darlene was the star of the shear show, too. No matter how short her wooly locks were snipped, with just a shot of Spanish Sur-Gro, it all grew back the very next day.

There was however, a downside to Darlene’s new luscious locks: the shepherd began paying way too much attention to her. Way too much.

But that is a story for another day.




SusanWritesPrecise/ Susan Marie Shuman


Author: The Abject Muse

Susan Marie Shuman is an author and freelance writer/editor who currently resides in the wilds of Birmingham, AL. She shares her life with four spoiled cats, several friends (not all of them imaginary) one husband and one step-son. When she's not working, Susan enjoys horseback riding, reading, taking her cats for a spin in their pet stroller, and taking naps. An ex-bartender, recovering crash test dummy and all-around late bloomer, Susan graduated from the University of South Alabama in 2004 with a BA in English. She minored in Russian. Long-range goals include visiting Israel, the Czech Republic and Liechtenstein. Susan is also planning to launch a micronation which would be called either Suzannistan or Eastern Suzanorovia.

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